Right Here
by RatherBeAWriter
Summary: Post-200, JJ's ordeal catches up with her and she needs looking after. Will takes care of his girl.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Time for more JJ and Will fluff! Just a short one-shot. Post-200, right after the episode ends. First time I've tried to write something that ties in with an actual storyline. Hope you like it and let me know what you think!**

**Also, if anyone's been reading it, I haven't forgotten Ready or Not and have written a few more chapters but just need to fix the one that connects them to the rest of the story. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Criminal Minds etc. etc. **

The noisy, crowded bar and her friends' high spirits had prolonged the effects of the adrenaline on her body. For a while she had enjoyed their company; she had enjoyed the normality of the evening. But now JJ was exhausted and parts of her body she never knew existed were starting to hurt. She and Will had slowly strayed from the group and were standing together, watching the others from several feet away.

"Can we go home?" she whispered against her husband's chest as she swayed tiredly on her feet and allowed him to support more of her weight.

"Sure we can. Are you doin' OK?" Will asked, his lips pressed against her forehead. She shook her head slowly, remembering her promise of no more lies. He pulled away slightly and observed the look of discomfort on her face. "What's wrong?" he frowned.

"I'm just not feeling great – I'm really tired and my ribs hurt," she replied, quietly so as not to worry the others. He nodded in understanding.

"Let's go home," he agreed, turning himself and his wife back towards their friends so they could say goodbye.

"Is everything alright?" Hotch asked as they returned to the group.

"We're gonna head home," Will explained, keeping a comforting arm wrapped around JJ's shoulders. The team were disappointed that their night together was coming to an end but they could see that JJ needed some rest. Emily stepped forward to say goodbye to her friend and Will released JJ into her arms.

"Sorry, we're disappearing so early," JJ apologised. "I know you'll be leaving soon…" she trailed off. Emily shook her head.

"Don't worry about it," the brunette reassured her with a shake of her head. "You should be resting at home. And you can always take a vacation to London to visit me," she reminded her friend.

"I know," JJ nodded. The exhaustion and trauma from the past few days had left her emotional and she felt tears pooling in her eyes. "Emily, if you hadn't been here today; if you hadn't been able to help... I just… I can't even…" she struggled for words to express her fears over what could have happened. "Thank you."

"I was glad I could help," Emily smiled, tightening their hug but being careful not to aggravate JJ's injuries. "Now let Will take care of you – it's what he's there for!" she chuckled. "We'll speak soon."

"I'll call you when you're back in London," JJ promised as she stepped back towards her husband. Will draped his wife's jacket around her shoulders and pulled her close. They said goodbye to the others before stepping out into the cool night air.

"None of them mind you leavin'," Will reassured her, placing a kiss on her head as they crossed the street towards the car.

"I know," she murmured. "I don't know what's wrong with me." He opened the passenger side door, and helped her into the car, pausing to look her directly in the eye before he closed the door.

"There's nothin' wrong with you," he smiled. "You just need to rest. And let me take care of you," he added. "It's what I'm there for," he grinned and she returned a weak smile as he repeated Emily's words.

/  
/

"Henry's fast asleep," Will informed JJ, joining her in their bedroom after he had checked on their son. They had arrived home ten minutes earlier and quickly thanked and paid the babysitter. All JJ wanted was to lie down on her own bed and be alone with her family.

"Good," she smiled, though it didn't quite reach her eyes. She was currently perched on the end of the bed, staring at her reflection in the mirror. She seemed to have aged a decade in the time that had passed since she last saw her reflection. The dark circles encased her eyes and all colour had washed out of her face.

"What do you need?" he asked, sitting beside her and taking hold of her hand.

"I can't get my sweater off," she muttered dryly, a humourless chuckle and a wave of tears choking her. Her arms were weak and aching from being chained above her for so long.

"I've got it," Will soothed. Carefully, he eased one arm, and then the other, out of the garment. He moved her slowly, trying not to cause any unnecessary pain. "How 'bout you sleep in one of my shirts?" he suggested as he unclipped her bra, his eyes never leaving hers; never drawing attention to her injuries. If she wore one of his shirts she wouldn't have to stretch her arms over her head to dress. She nodded and he stood up and crossed to the dresser.

"Thank you," she said, in a delayed response to his assistance. He returned to her side and helped her into an old white shirt, crouching on the floor in front of her to do up the buttons. Seeing just how tired she was, he slowly unzipped and pulled off her jeans. He hated the way she tensed as his hands brushed over her thighs; he dreaded to think what that animal had threatened to do.

"You need to lie down now," he instructed, when she continued to sit on the bed and stare into space. "Come on, JJ." He ran his hand through her hair, pushing stray strands of blonde behind her ears. She gazed into his eyes but still she didn't respond. In one careful movement he lifted her from the bed and into his arms and, instinctively, she wrapped her arms around his neck. Supporting her with one arm, he pulled back the covers, before setting her down on the soft sheets.

"Thanks," she breathed once again.

"Stop sayin' that," he replied, kissing her forehead. "You don't need to thank me." He pulled the covers over her and smoothed down her hair. "Go to sleep," he instructed softly.

"Don't leave me," she whispered, in an uncharacteristic outburst of neediness, when he stepped away from the bed.

"I'm right here," he assured her. "I'm just gettin' changed and then I'll be with you." She watched him as he undressed. Her eyes were heavy and she could hardly focus her vision but she was scared that if she looked away he'd be gone and she'd be back with Askari in the basement.

"Will?" she asked, struggling to stay conscious as he settled down in the bed beside her.

"Yeah?" he responded, slowly wrapping his arm around her, mindful that she was in pain.

JJ's head filled with all the things she wanted to say to him. She wanted to share her heartbreak over the baby they had lost; she wanted to apologise a hundred times for failing to tell him; she wanted to tell him that he and Henry were the only reason she had managed to survive; she wanted to tell him she loved him. But the words jumbled up and were lost somewhere between her hazy mind and tired muscles. So instead she stared up at his gentle, caring eyes and willed him to, somehow, understand what she wanted him to know.

As he absent-mindedly stroked her hair, Will's mind was also filled with thoughts he could not seem to voice. He needed to be close to her. He needed to be touching her just so he could be one hundred percent sure that she was there - that she was alive. He wanted to tell her that he couldn't live without her; to tell her that she could not scare him like that again. He had to be sure that she knew that they would have another child but that even if they didn't, he had all he needed right here. But just like his wife, he couldn't form the sentences required to say any of these things out loud.

So they held their gaze for several moments and in that time reached a silent agreement that they were together and safe, and that everything else could wait until morning.

"Close your eyes," he whispered. "I'll be right here."

And despite everything that had happened, JJ had all the reassurance she required, and drifted into a deep and restful sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: So this really was just going to be a one shot but it didn't take much to persuade me to write more! Thank you for the reviews, follows and faves. Hope you enjoy a little bit more :)**

While JJ slept soundly, Will struggled to keep his eyes closed for more than ten minutes at a time. As the night progressed, he gave up on sleep and instead lay awake, calming himself with the sound of JJ's even breathing and the steady rise and fall of her chest. His ears became attuned to every sound of the house. He became aware of a dripping tap that he'd never noticed before and heard every bird waken up in the trees that lined their street. By the time the first rays of light streamed through the window he no longer believed that the night could be silent.

But still JJ slept. She looked peaceful; her face betrayed no sign of her ordeal. Yet as the light grew brighter in the room, he became aware that her fists were clenched around the duvet, like she would never let go of its comfort and protection.

Around half seven, the repetitive soundtrack of JJ's breathing, and the soft birdsong, and the dripping tap, was interrupted by the sound of movement in Henry's bedroom. Will turned towards the door, waiting for his son's imminent arrival. Sure enough, Henry appeared in the doorway, his hair sticking out at odd angles and a puzzled expression on his face.

"It's morning," he informed his father, as though his parents could have missed this occurrence. He couldn't understand why they were still in bed; it was his mom who normally woke him up for school.

"It is, but Momma's still sleepin'," Will replied to his son in a hushed voice. "So we got to be quiet." Henry clambered onto the end of the bed and across the duvet to join his parents.

"Why's she sleeping?" he asked in an exaggerated whisper, which brought a smile to Will's face.

"'Cause she's tired," he explained. "She didn't get much sleep the last couple of days." Henry paused to digest this information. He knew something bad had happened – he hadn't gone to school and he and his dad had gone somewhere he didn't know with people that dressed like his mom's friends. And his mom had been crying when she came to get them.

"How much more is Momma going to sleep?" he asked, carefully watching the mound of covers under which his mother lay.

"I'm awake," JJ mumbled before Will had a chance to answer. She groaned slightly as she tried to turn over and sit up. Will instinctively reached out to help her.

"Easy," he warned with a frown as she grimaced at the pain in her side and arms. "You OK?" She nodded a little hesitantly.

"How could I not be?" She forced a smile. "I've got my favourite boys here."

"Morning, Momma." Henry climbed over Will's legs to reach her. "Are you hurt?" His small features twisted with worry as she winced again.

"I'm fine," she reassured him. "Now what is going on with your hair?" she smiled, hoping to distract him with a change of topic. Using everything she had to hide the pain it caused, she reached out to smooth down her son's unruly blonde mane. He giggled and ducked away from her hand in a well-rehearsed game they played almost every day.

"Can I have breakfast now?" Henry asked. "Please," he added.

"Sure. Daddy will get you something," JJ responded, and her son turned his attention to dragging his father out of bed. With Henry hanging off of one arm, Will turned back to look at JJ, seeking assurance that she was OK on her own. "I'm going to take a quick shower and then I'll join you," she told them. "Henry, it's your job to make sure Daddy cooks something nice for us." She forced another grin, unsure whether it convinced her husband, but relieved that all traces of concern had left her son's expression.

As soon as she heard them making their way downstairs she allowed the smile to slide from her face and she collapsed back against the pillows, instantly regretting the sudden movement. It took several minutes of controlled breathing before she attempted to get out of bed, and at that moment she realised it was going to take a lot more than a night's sleep to make her feel normal again.

/  
/

Will made scrambled eggs for Henry and then, after hearing the water running upstairs for ten minutes, he set about making the same for himself and JJ. Their choice of breakfast items was limited by the fact that JJ had planned on grocery shopping the night she was taken. Greatly distracted by listening out for her finishing in the shower, he put some bread in the toaster and then returned his attention to the eggs. In the corner of the room the coffee pot hissed and spluttered. Will jumped at the sudden noise, spilling some of the eggs from the pan onto the floor. Henry looked up from his food.

"You spilled some," he innocently pointed, out and Will had to restrain himself from snapping at his son. It wasn't Henry's fault he was so tired and out of sorts. Without a word, he removed the pan from the heat and cleaned up the mess. The sound of the shower still occupied a prime spot in his mind. What was taking her so long?

"Daddy!" Henry exclaimed suddenly. Will spun around in a panic.

"What's wrong?"

"The toast!" Henry pointed towards the toaster, where black smoke was beginning to spiral up towards the ceiling. Will quickly turned off the machine and threw the smouldering bread into the sink. He opened the window, wafting the smoke away from the smoke detector. Thankfully he'd got there in time and they were spared the shrill tones of the alarm. He sighed, rubbing his tired eyes.

"Henry, I'm just gonna pop upstairs to see where Momma's got to," he explained to his son, realising that he wouldn't be able to concentrate on even the simplest of tasks until he had assured himself that JJ was OK.

/  
/

Undressing had been surprisingly easy, given Will's smart thinking on what she should wear, and she hadn't had to stretch too far to turn on the shower. She had longed for the relief of the hot water on her sore, aching muscles. But she had only been standing for a couple of minutes when she started to feel dizzy. Perhaps it was the increase in temperature caused by the hot steam, or maybe the intense pain across her ribs with each breath, or it could even have been the fact she couldn't even remember when she last ate.

Regardless of the cause, she began to panic. The heat was no longer soothing, but was stifling, and the humid air seemed impossible to breathe. In her mind, the spray of water hitting her face no longer stemmed from the shower head but was under Askari's control. She gasped for breath, her vision blurry with tears and her body desperately seeking escape from the water. She backed into the corner of the shower, away from the spray, and she slid down the wall to a sitting position. The tears became sobs as she sat frozen to the spot, with the sound of rushing water filling her ears and the steam filled shower cubicle closing her off from any other reality. She was not OK.

/  
/

He didn't want to kick the door in. That seemed like an overreaction. She was probably just taking her time and enjoying the warmth; she had been freezing the previous night. And the hot water would be working wonders on her arms. Breaking the lock on the door would definitely be an overreaction.

But he called her name once. And then he called it again. And there was still no response.

"JJ!" he shouted, one more time to give her some warning, as he put all his weight behind his shoulder and threw himself into the door. "JJ," he gasped, stumbling into the centre of the room. Though steam filled the room and misted up the glass of the shower door, he could see her shaking form crouched in the corner. He slid open the door and turned off the water, soaking his T-shirt in the process. She looked up at him with wide, desperate eyes. "It's alright, darlin'," his mouth told her, while his brain wondered how any of this could ever be OK.

She wasn't sure exactly how he got her out of the shower, but she was soon perched on the edge of the bathtub, wrapped in a towel, with Will holding her tightly against his chest. Her long hair was dripping wet and she could feel that his T-shirt was sticking to his body. He must have been uncomfortable but he wouldn't let her go. And she couldn't let go of him either.

"I'm getting you wet," she mumbled weakly.

"It's only water," he assured her, and if anything pulled her closer. _It's only water._ That wasn't how it had seemed to her only minutes before.

"I don't think I'm OK," she whispered. He sighed, pressing his lips against the top of her head.

"But you will be." His voice carried more certainty than either of them felt.

"How can you be so sure?" She turned to look at him, her eyes telling him that the question was as honest as anything that Henry would ask. He smiled as he gently cupped his hand around her cheek.

"I'm sure because you are Jennifer Jareau. And you are my wife and Henry's Momma, and the best damn FBI agent I've ever known. You're gonna be just fine."

JJ knew she had a long way to go; they had a long way to go. This wasn't a bruise that would fade in a few days or a near miss with an UNSUB that would cause a few unsettling dreams. But her husband's words replayed over and over again in her head and as the days went on she put more and more faith in them. She was Jennifer Jareau and he was William LaMontagne and they would be just fine.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: So I've got really into this now and won't be happy until it has a proper conclusion! Reckon there will be another couple of chapters. This one is a little more angsty but I promise there will be happy fluff in the future! Thanks again for all the reviews and interest in this story. :)**

Several days passed. Will returned to work. JJ asked to return to work and was informed that that would happen when Hell froze over, or when she was officially cleared, both physically and mentally, by a doctor – whichever came first. Hotch could sympathise with JJ's desire to return to normality, but he would never let himself forget what had happened after Elle's shooting and he would not risk allowing any of his agents to return to the field before they were ready.

So JJ busied herself at home, taking care of Henry and getting on with all the chores that normally built up around the house. She cleared out the garage, which necessitated spending most of the next day lying down – perhaps it was too soon to do so much heavy lifting. She baked cookies for Henry's school open day, and then rushed to the store to buy some that wouldn't risk chipping someone's tooth – no amount of time at home would turn her into Martha Stewart! And she fixed the dripping tap, which Will claimed kept him awake every night – though it didn't seem to cure his insomnia.

However, amongst all the cleaning and fixing, the lock on the bathroom door remained broken. Though neither would say it out loud, both JJ and Will knew there was no sense in repairing something when there remained a real possibility that it would need to be broken again. Despite the routine they were slipping into, they were only too aware that JJ was far from herself.

On this particular occasion she'd had a good day. She'd taken Henry to the park after school. She'd sat on a bench and watched him play, enjoying the warmth of the early autumn sun on her face. In the bright park, surrounded by other moms and the excited squeals and laughter of children, she felt more relaxed than she had since the night Will took her home from the bar. The scene calmed the irrational part of her brain, in which Hastings and Askari were very much alive, and allowed her logical mind to enjoy the simple pleasure of spending time with her son.

But the next morning, at twenty-four minutes past two, she woke from a restless sleep to find that the bed beside her was still empty and all rationality went out the window. Will's shift had finished at midnight and her mind raced with all the possibilities to explain his delay. None of them were good.

"Will, where are you? Call me. Please. I'm getting worried." She ended her message – her third in half an hour – and paced the dimly lit kitchen with the phone still in her hand. As she moved past the window she jumped at her own reflection, which appeared ghostly and pale against the dark glass. It took several moments for her heart rate to return to its normal rhythm. In that time she drummed her fingers agitatedly on the counter, glancing between the house phone and her cell, as if somehow she might have missed a call. Or maybe she was just willing them to ring.

"Momma?" Henry's voice came from stairs and soon he appeared at the kitchen door. She was once again startled by the unexpected noise.

"Henry, you made me jump," she breathed, placing her shaking hands on the edge of the counter. "What are you doing out of bed?"

"I heard a noise and you weren't in your bed," the child explained, still standing in the half dark of the hallway. His skin and hair, as pale as his mother's, stood out against his surroundings.

"Mommy's just not feeling very sleepy tonight," JJ explained, trying to hide the anxiety in her voice. "I'm sorry I woke you up. Just go back to bed," she instructed calmly and with a gentle smile, though if she hadn't been tightly gripping the counter she was sure her whole body, and her voice, would be trembling.

"Tuck me in?" he asked.

"I'll be right up," she nodded and he scurried back into the darkness and up the stairs. Taking a deep breath, she tried to calm her nerves. What was wrong with her? How could her six year old be so relaxed about exploring the dark house, while her heart raced at the slightest noise?

"Pull yourself together," she muttered, wondering how she'd become the crazy person talking to herself in the middle of the night. She turned to follow Henry upstairs, but before she could leave the kitchen, the sound of movement from out in the street caused the knot of fear in her stomach to expand. Blood pounding in her ears, she reached for the gun she had stowed in a drawer by the sink. They were normally so careful to lock their weapons in the safe, but tonight, when she realised Will wasn't home, and that feeling of insecurity grew from a low lever murmur to an incapacitating roar, she had needed a defence within easier reach.

The noises grew closer as she crept into the hallway, with the cold metal safety blanket clutched firmly in her hands. A shadowy figure moved beyond the small glass panel in the door. Her mind lost any grip on reality and the threat posed to her family by Hastings and Askari, though she knew them to be deceased, was all too real. She prepared herself for a fight; no one would have the chance to lay a hand on her again. No one would ever get near her son.

Her terror climaxed and then quickly died off as she heard the distinct sound of a key in the lock and then the lamp by the door was turned on, chasing away all the shadows. She stood in the hallway, the tears in her eyes and the gun hanging limply by her side illuminated by the new source of light. Will stared back at her, pausing in the middle of taking off his jacket to comprehend the situation.

"JJ, what are you doin'?" he asked slowly, his eyes darting between the fearful look plastered across her face and the Glock dangling by her side.

"You're late," she responded flatly. "I've been calling you."

"How 'bout you give me the gun?" He moved steadily, taking care not to startle her, and extended his arm to take the weapon from limp hand. She put up no resistance and he carefully placed it on the unit beside them.

"You told me I would be OK," JJ breathed, with a slight shake of her head. Her wild eyes gazed both at him and through him. "You told me I would be OK," she repeated, raising her voice as hot tears spilled down her cheeks.

"JJ, come and sit down." He reached out to her, planning on guiding her through to the living room to take a seat, but she pushed him away. He was rather taken aback by the force in her action. "JJ c'mon…" he trailed off, at a loss for how to handle her.

"No!" she shouted, surprising even herself with the volume of her outburst. "You lied to me; I am not OK!"

"You will be," he assured her, trying to calm the situation.

"No I won't! Everytime I close my eyes I see him; everytime I wake up there's a moment when I am back in that basement! I can't take a shower! I can't sleep on my own! If I'm not dreaming about him then I'm dreaming about the baby! I am not OK!" Her voice cracked on the last few syllables. "And you were late." As silence fell, the pain Will felt for his wife was as physical as any injury he'd experienced before.

"JJ," he whispered, having no words other than her name.

"Don't tell me I'll be fine," she continued quietly. "This is not fine."


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: It took me so long to figure out what I wanted to do with this chapter so apologies for the delay in updating. I had so many ideas but eventually settled on this one so I hope you enjoy it. Thanks again for the reviews of the last chapter - they really helped me with where to go :) **

"Can you please go and see to Henry?" JJ's voice croaked, breaking the uncomfortable quiet which filled the hall. She was sitting on the bottom step of the stairs, leaning over her knees and holding her head in her hands. "He woke up and I told him I'd tuck him in," she explained, in the same quiet voice, when Will didn't move from the spot he seemed fixed upon.

"Sure," he replied, blindly following her instruction, almost relieved that she had found him a way out of the aftermath of her outburst. Of course he wanted to help her; he'd stay up all night if that's what she needed. But right now he was at a complete loss for what to do or say.

"Hey there, little man," he smiled, adopting a light and reassuring tone as he entered his son's room. Henry was in his bed with his fire truck emblazoned duvet pulled up to cover most of his face. Only his wide eyes and tufts of blonde hair were visible.

"Are you and Momma fighting?" he asked, as his father crossed the floor and crouched by his bed.

"No we're not," Will reassured him with a smile, gently stroking his hair.

"But Momma was shouting," the small boy puzzled, pulling back the covers and revealing the worried frown on his tired face.

"She's just a bit upset," Will explained in a soothing voice.

"Why?" Henry yawned.

"You know when you have a bad dream and get scared of monsters that aren't really there?" Will asked his son, attempting to set up the basis on which he could explain why the boy's mother was shouting and crying in the middle of the night. Henry nodded slowly. "Well, Momma's a bit scared of some monsters right now."

"Look in the closet and under the bed," Henry mumbled sleepily.

"What's that?" Will asked, confused by his son's statement.

"When I'm scared you show me there's no monsters under the bed or in the closet," Henry explained. Will smiled as he understood what his son was suggesting.

"That's right, buddy. So now, I'm gonna go get your Momma and show her that no monsters can hurt her. And I need you to be a big boy and go back to sleep so I can look after her. Can you do that?"

"Yes, Daddy," Henry yawned, as his father tucked the covers around him.

"Good boy. I'll see you in the mornin'." He kissed the top of his head and stood up to return to JJ.

"Love you," Henry murmured, starting to drift off to sleep.

"I love you too," Will replied softly and he left his son's room feeing far more able to deal with JJ's monsters than he had before.

/  
/

JJ was sitting at the kitchen table, cradling a steaming mug between her hands and staring down at its contents, when he returned downstairs.

"Is he OK?" she asked without looking up from her tea.

"He was asleep before I left the room," Will assured, tentatively taking a seat across the table from her. She nodded in response and lifted the mug to her mouth to take a sip. It was still much too hot to drink and the liquid burned as it wet her lips, but she needed to do something other than avoid eye contact with her husband.

"You should go to bed," she stated after a few minutes of silence. "You must be tired after working so late." There was a slight edge to her voice; she knew, given her line of work, that she couldn't complain at his working late, but she was annoyed that he hadn't answered her calls.

"I'm not that tired," he lied. "And I'm sorry I didn't call." He didn't offer any further explanation for his lateness – he didn't want to add to her anxiety. In truth he'd spent the last few hours hovering around the ER, waiting on his partner. They'd been chasing down a suspect when the teenager had unexpectedly opened fire. His partner, Danny, took a bullet, which had thankfully been caught by his vest, and Will had managed to disarm the boy before he could do any further harm. Everyone was safe in the end, but it was one more near miss that had left him shaken.

"What happened to keep you late?" she asked. He sighed as the words left her mouth, realising he couldn't lie.

"Danny got a little banged up chasin' a suspect," he explained, hoping that was enough to satisfy her. "But he's fine now." JJ looked up for the first time since her husband joined her in the kitchen. She suddenly felt awful; of course it would have taken something bad to stop Will from getting it touch. And she had completely neglected to check that he was alright.

"I'm so sorry," she sighed, shaking her head and chewing the inside of her lip to fight back the onslaught of another wave of tears. "I've been so wrapped up in myself that I didn't even think about what was going on with you. Are you OK?"

"I'm fine," he assured her. Taking it to be a good sign that she was now looking directly at him rather than avoiding his gaze, he reached across the table and placed his hand over hers. "I'm just worried about you. Talk to me, JJ," he half pleaded and half instructed. She closed her fingers around his as she considered her response.

"About what?"

"Whatever you want. Tell me exactly what your feelin'," His soft eyes remained connected to her own, telling her that she could say anything and he would pass no judgement, and that he'd listen for as long as she needed.

"I'm scared," she admitted.

"Of what?" he prompted. Baby steps. That was how this conversation was going to happen. But they would get there.

"Everything," she replied, with a humourless laugh. He squeezed her hand, encouraging her to continue. "I'm scared of Hastings and Askari." It sounded so stupid when she said it out loud. "I mean, I know they're dead but when I'm on my own…" she trailed off, shaking her head. "I know it's stupid."

"It's not," he assured her. "What else scares you?" He was determined to hear it all; he never wanted to see her so distressed again.

"I'm scared I won't ever feel normal again – that I'll keep freaking out at the slightest thing and that I won't be able to look after Henry or do my job."

"It's not even been a week. There's a reason Hotch is makin' you take time off. This is gonna take time." His fingers tightened around hers once again, as if to punctuate his reassurance.

"But what about the things time won't change?" she asked quietly, returning to staring at the slowly cooling tea.

"Like what?"

"I…," she began, but seemed to change her mind.

"Say it," he coaxed. "Whatever it is."

"I'm scared that you'll hate me for taking away a chance for you to be a father again." She dared to look up – she had to see his reaction, no matter what it was.

"Oh JJ, I could never hate you." The words slipped out of his mouth as effortlessly as a breath, and of all that he had said, of all the words of comfort and reassurance he had offered her, nothing had sounded so honest or so believable.

As a weak smile formed on her lips, he let go of her hand and ran his thumb across her damp cheeks. Taking him by surprise, she leaned across the table and kissed him. It wasn't just a gesture of thanks or a distraction from her pain, but was filled with all the energy of her overwhelming emotions, and above all else, with hope. As their lips connected, she was firmly reminded that while she had lost so much and been changed so greatly, nothing could change the possibilities that the future held. She was alive. She was loved and she loved back. And though the fear may remain for some time, her family and the possibility of happiness would last longer.

When the first rays of sunlight emerged over the horizon, JJ and Will were still to be found sitting on either side of the kitchen table. They discussed how they would handle the bad days that were inevitably still to be endured. They cried; both of them; together in their grief for the child that they would never know. They talked of counselling and therapists, but also of lazy Sundays and family vacations. They laughed as they imagined Henry's excitement at a tour around London on a red bus. And as the day fully awakened, they were joined by that same excited child, who marvelled at the fact his parents had stayed up all night long and glowed with happiness at the knowledge that they would be spending the whole day at home with him.

JJ was not OK. But she could accept that, because one day she would be, and getting there was something she would never have to face alone.

**A/N: One more chapter (more of an epilogue really) planned and it'll probably be pure fluff!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: So first of all, apologies for the delay in posting. I've had the craziest but most amazing week, and on top of that hated my original draft of this chapter so completely redid it. Anyway, I feel I should warn everyone that this really is total fluff since I wanted to end on a happy note! And minor warning that I decided to centre the fluff on their anniversary so their are a couple of slightly suggestive moments. Thanks for the reviews of the last chapter and to everyone who followed/faved this story. This chapter was the most fun to write so I hope you like it!**

Three months had passed since JJ returned to work and while memories still haunted her dreams, after a bad day or when she was feeling particularly stressed, her fear was a mere ghost that she had learned to chase away. Today was her and Will's anniversary. She smiled to herself as she turned the frame in her hands and looked at the photograph to check that it was sitting straight. The memory of the moment it held played once again in her mind.

_"Will!" she screamed, her stomach flipping over and her knuckles white, as she braced herself for what came next. _

_"I'm right here," he replied, raising his voice over the noise that surrounded them. He reached for her hand and squeezed it tightly as they gazed, wide-eyed, at the ground far beneath them. _

_There was a brief moment, when the noise subsided and she could feel her heart pounding in her chest, that she glanced towards her husband and saw a look in his eyes which suggested he was not as fearless as he proclaimed to be. A small smile formed on her lips as they tipped ever further forward. _

_"Arrgghhhhhhhhh!" A surprisingly high-pitched scream escaped Will's mouth as they plummeted towards the ground. She found herself laughing. She felt free as they dropped and shot straight back up towards the sky. And for the first time in a long time all she could feel was the wind in her hair and the warmth of happiness stirring inside._

She had purchased the souvenir photograph the instant they got off the rollercoaster and mercilessly teased Will in the hours that followed, despite his insistence that he was "only screamin' for the camera so Henry would laugh". They had been on a family vacation to London, taking up Emily's invitation to visit, and at Henry's insistence they had spent a day at a theme park. Disheartened that he was too small for most of the rides, Henry had eventually found a better source of amusement, in perching on Emily's shoulders and watching his ever-so-slightly apprehensive parents ride whichever attraction he selected.

"What you doing?" her son asked, as he joined her where she was kneeling by the coffee table.

"Wrapping Daddy's present," JJ explained, tilting the frame so Henry could see the photo.

"I like that picture," he giggled. "Daddy was so scared!"

"Do you think Daddy will like it?" JJ smiled. Henry chewed his lip for a moment as he thought and then nodded his head. "Why's that?" JJ asked.

"'Cause we had a really fun day. And you look smiley. Daddy likes it when you're happy," he replied with the honest logic of a six year old, which had, by chance, sounded rather profound. JJ had meant the present as a joke to accompany his real anniversary present, but the photograph seemed to capture so much that was important to them. She was laughing, with her eyes closed as she felt the rush of air against her face and her hair blew wildly around, and Will's wide eyes and open mouth instantly brought her back to the laughter and teasing that filled the afternoon. And looking closely, the tight grip which they had of each other's hand was clearly visible – a grip which she knew they would have through whatever life threw at them next.

"Are you ready to go to Aunty Penelope's?" she asked, placing the frame on the square of wrapping paper she had laid on the table and changing the subject before she became too emotional. Henry nodded and showed his mother the oversized rucksack he was struggling to carry on his back.

"I just have to find my bow tie," he explained. JJ eyed him with a puzzled expression.

"We're going to play Doctor Who. Uncle Spence is coming and Aunty Penelope is going to make a Dalek costume," he informed her, stressing every syllable of Penelope's name, proud that he could now say it clearly and properly. JJ laughed – with her friends as his extended family Henry had no chance of growing up without sci-fi regularly featuring in his life.

"You'd better hurry up and get it then," JJ grinned. "She'll be here in a minute and you don't have a TARDIS to help you out!" She waited for her son to laugh but he didn't seem to understand the joke and simply dropped his heavy rucksack on the floor and ran off in search of his missing bow tie.

"Don't worry, I think you're funny," Will smirked, leaning against the doorway.

"Will!" she shrieked. "I'm wrapping your present! Go away!" She desperately scrambled to cover the frame with the paper and stick it together.

"I'm not lookin'," he insisted, raising his hands and closing his eyes. "I just came to find this beautiful blonde chick to see if she wanted to know where her man's takin' her tonight. But y'know if she's busy…"

"No, tell me!" She quickly stuck some tape to the parcel, not caring that it looked like Henry had wrapped it and jumped to her feet. Perhaps she was a little too excited about tonight but it had been so long since they had a night to themselves.

"Who said it's you I'm talkin' about?" he raised his eyebrows teasingly. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her body close to his.

"You got yourself a bit on the side LaMontagne?" she grinned, mimicking his Southern drawl. "Y'know I carry a gun?"

"Oh, yeah?" he smirked. "I don't feel one just now." He ran his hands over the smooth material of the evening dress which clung to her hips, and slowly leaned down to kiss her. Passionately, she returned the kiss, feeling his smile with her lips. He pulled away to take in the full effect of her outfit and carefully pinned hair. The dark dress fitted her perfectly, tightly hugging all the right places, while flowing elegantly to just above her knees. Her hair was styled so as to frame her face with blonde curls. But most importantly her eyes seemed to sparkle with an energy that had been slowly replenished over the past few months and now illuminated her whole face.

"What are you staring at?" she questioned, blushing slightly under his intense gaze, even after all the years they had been together.

"You have no idea how beautiful you are," he breathed as a misty look formed in his eyes.

"Are you going soft on me?" she laughed, but her expression mirrored his. "Happy anniversary," she smiled, after a pause.

"Happy anniversary," he replied softly. "Now turn around and let me see that dress," he grinned. She spun round on the spot, allowing her skirt to swing out exaggeratedly. He wolf whistled, jokingly. "You scrub up alright, Mrs LaMontagne," he winked. She widened her eyes at the name she was never called.

"I suppose you'll do," she smirked, appreciating the sight of her husband in a full suit. "Where are we going?"

"I'm not tellin'," he answered with a small laugh. "It's a surprise." She sighed, shaking her head at his teasing.

"What surprise?" Henry asked, re-appearing in the room, complete with a pre-tied bow tie draped loosely round his neck.

"Where I'm takin' your Momma tonight is a surprise," Will answered, leaning down to adjust his son's bow tie. If he was going to dress up as the Doctor then he might as well do it properly. "Have you got your sonic screwdriver?" he asked, throwing JJ a smile, as the doorbell rang and Henry ran excitedly into the hall. The small boy paused to answer his father's question by pulling the very important device from his pocket.

JJ followed Henry towards the door, where he was jumping up and down to see his godparents through the glass. As soon as she opened the door, Henry launched himself towards the visitors. Reid caught hold of him and lifted him up, surprised once again at how much the boy had grown since the last time he saw him.

"Look, I'm the Doctor!" Henry squealed, as Garcia and Spencer reacted with exaggerated, impressed expressions.

"I hope you know what you've let yourself in for!" JJ grinned.

"Oh, you look beautiful, JJ!" Garcia gushed as she turned to her friend. "I hope that man of yours is taking you somewhere special."

"It's a surprise," Will replied, joining them in the hallway.

"I don't like surprises," JJ reminded him, but the glint in her eyes made it clear she was only winding him up.

"You'll like this one," Will smiled, sliding close to her and wrapping his arms around his waist. For a moment JJ forgot they were in the company of their friends and kissed him deeply.

"And that is our cue to leave," Garcia announced quickly, screwing up her face. "Come along littlest doctor – let's get your stuff." Henry jumped down from Spencer's arms and rushed off to get his rucksack.

"Thanks again for doing this," JJ told her friends, for the hundredth time since Garcia had offered to babysit.

"It's nothing; we're going to have fun," Garcia insisted.

"I've picked out the best episodes of Doctor Who for us to watch," Reid informed her. "And I've made sure they are all completely child friendly with nothing too frightening," he pre-empted her next question. JJ smiled, knowing she could fully trust the two members of her BAU family to take good care of Henry.

"And we're going to stop to get pizza on the way there," Garcia piped up as Henry re-joined them with the oversized rucksack and a stuffed toy dinosaur under his arm. He cheered as he moved towards the door as quickly as he could, taking into account the struggle to carry his large green companion. No one questioned the latest addition to his sleepover kit.

"All ready?" JJ asked, crouching down to kiss her son goodbye. Henry nodded and Will joined them at child level and whispered in his son's ear.

"Have a good night Momma. You look really pretty," he told her with a wide grin. Will ruffled his hair and kissed the top of his head. Penelope looked like she might explode at the adorableness of the family.

"Thank you," JJ smiled. "Be good."

"I will," he assured her with all the sincerity a child could manage, and turned his attention back to his godparents. And after all the goodbyes and wishes for a good night had been exchanged, JJ and Will were left alone to enjoy their evening.

/  
/

Staying true to his word, Will provided JJ with a surprise that she would enjoy. They exchanged gifts before heading out and JJ's outfit was completed with a pair of diamond earrings, while Will's was completed with a new watch and a slight grin from being reminded of their trip to the theme park. Their evening was filled with champagne and French food and dancing, though they registered very little other than the smiles that were fixed to one another's faces. And on their return home, it only took the closing of the front door before they became utterly absorbed in each other. Before they knew it they were upstairs.

"You fixed the bathroom door," JJ noted, breathlessly, as her back slammed against the wall. Will kissed her before responding.

"You're noticin' that now?" he questioned with a laugh.

"Guess I'm just a great mutlitasker," she shrugged, running her hands down his spine.

"I know we've got the whole place to ourselves, but do you want to try it out and take a shower?" he grinned, already directing her into the room. She nodded in agreement without breaking away from their kiss. Soon the steam filled the room and the hot water lashed across JJ's skin, but her mind was far too preoccupied to remember the night the lock had been broken.

That night there were no fears or nightmares in the LaMontagne house. Along the hallway and stairs, which had once been filled with shadows and anxious raised voices, were the discarded clothes of a couple who only had thoughts of one another. At the kitchen table, on which cups of steaming tea had once comforted parents grieving for an unborn child, were the remnants of a bottle of champagne and two empty glasses. And eventually, in the bed in which a terrified wife had once clung to her worried husband, a couple slept contentedly in each other's arms, simply because there was nowhere else they would rather be. There would be days when the ghosts would return and they would need one another for comfort once again but they were happy. And tonight had been perfect.


End file.
